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At four o’clock that evening, Dr. Cotten, her neonatal doctor, came in to tell us that she had taken a turn for the
worst. Ashley asked him percentage wise what we were looking at and his response floored us both. He said
Parker had a 1 to 2 percent chance of making it through the next 12-24 hours. He said that we should prepare
ourselves and families and suggested we make our way to NICU to spend time with her. Our nurse got me
together and for the first time since being born I saw my baby girl. I was in no way prepared for what I would
see. She lay there so helpless but so beautiful! She was truly her Daddy's little girl! We sat with her, held her
and just talked to her! She even opened her eyes a few times! What a sight! We left Parker and went back to
our room. Ashley and I both broke down and I started bargaining with God. Seeing our daughter that helpless
was more than either of us could bare. She was so fragile but yet so strong. Neither of us could sleep and we
just sat up comforting each other. At midnight, they came back to tell us that Parker’s condition was not
improving. She was getting worse and they sat with us explaining the options we had. They wanted us to be
prepared and we were so thankful for that.
At four a.m. they came back and told us that Parker had gotten worse. They wanted to know what Ashley and I
wanted for Parker and we made the decision to let her go. Her CDH was so severe as was her lung problem.
She could not release her carbon dioxide and eventually she would have died of carbon dioxide poisoning.
They could keep her sedated but that was not the life we wanted for Parker. The hardest decision Ashley and I
could ever make was to let Parker go but we wanted her to go peacefully. We called our families, who were
living in a hotel nearby, and told them to get there soon. We all made our way down to NICU, where they
unhooked the machines and we held our daughter as she was baptised. It was so nice to hold her without the
tubes. She took her last breath in her Daddy's arms at 5 a.m. exactly. They took her from us to clean her up
and brought her to our room for us to spend some private and very precious time with.
There are no words to describe what it felt like to hold our baby girl! We find great comfort in knowing that her
last breath was with her Daddy and I. We believe with all our heart that Parker could hear us and knew that we
were there with her the moment she entered this world and the moment she left it. This experience has truly
humbled us and has made our faith in God stronger. Our Parker is in Heaven and watching over her Mommy
and Daddy! We realize that our journey has just begun and ask that you continue to pray for us. We had our
Parker for 20 hours and it is the greatest 20 hours of our lives! We are blessed to be her Mommy and Daddy
and will do our best to honor her.
If we can ever do anything to help other families going through this please feel free to contact us via email at
parker@parkersingletary.com.
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